In case you missed it, author Rebecca Kauffman wrote an article for Publishers Weekly a week or two ago about her resistance to social media. Kauffman sums up what I’ve been thinking about that subject for years, but to borrow from Alexander Pope, she wrote “what oft was thought but ne’er so well expressed.”
Confession: I actually don’t like blogging. For one thing, I don’t think anyone reads my blog. And for another, having conversations with strangers makes me a little uncomfortable. And finally, I can’t shake the feeling that while I’m blogging a blog nobody reads, I could be spending that time writing a book.
So why do I have a blog or any of that stuff? Because publishers want writers to have those things. I wonder sometimes what JD Salinger would have done had he written in this day and age. Or Faulkner! Just imagine, the man who gave up his job as postmaster by writing in his resignation letter, “I will be damned if I propose to be at the beck and call of every itinerant scoundrel who has two cents to invest in a postage stamp” having to put something about himself online week after week and having to delete all the “what a great post” comments from hair tonic robots! In one of the collections of Faulkner’s letters I read some years ago, he told a friend about receiving letters from readers. He said something to the effect of, “I suppose I ought to answer them, but I don’t.”
I guess when you’re Faulkner you can do what you want.
The rest of us who write, I suppose, will have to continue to hide in plain sight on the internet…because that has become part of it.
*Title of today’s blog is a nod to a much better poem from a much better writer.
In all the creative writing classes I took in college, no one ever taught me something kind of important:
When to end a chapter.
Luckily, most of us who write read enough books that we wind up with an innate sense of chapter breaks. My rule of thumb is that each chapter should have a sense of a scene’s being over, plus a little unfinished business. It’s that unfinished business that will make the reader tell herself, “Just one more chapter” because she’s dying to know what happens next.
Of course, like everything else in writing, the only rule is that there are no rules. I offer William Faulkner’s As I Lay Dying as evidence.
If you’ve ever read As I Lay Dying, you can probably clearly recall getting to the chapter with only five words and feeling like Marty McFly being blown to the other side of the room by a giant, loud amp. Those five words, “My mother is a fish,” might be the biggest mic drop in twentieth century American literature.
Just one more reason, folks, why Faulkner is the man.
It was a dark and stormy night.
That’s how Snoopy starts his novels as he sits on the roof of his doghouse and types on his typewriter. He never seems to get much further, but maybe that’s because the roof line on his doghouse must be uncomfortable for sitting, or maybe it’s because he’s still using a typewriter, or maybe it’s because he’s beginning with setting. (Digression 1: Don’t you just love Snoopy?)
I can remember going to a writers’ conference back when I was in high school. The panel of speakers talked about the importance of setting. But this was the 80s, and I wonder if what those experts said then is still true. Continue reading ‘How Important Is Setting?’
Does the name William Zabka mean anything to you?
Maybe not. But William Zabka is an actor, screenwriter, director, and producer who has a pretty extensive and impressive IMDB page. If you look at the photo of William Zabka on that same page, he looks like a well-adjusted guy you might chat with at your kids’ soccer game.
But William Zabka is best known (to me, anyway) as the mean nemesis in The Karate Kid.
This brings me to the point of today’s blog post: writers rely heavily on our memories for material. For example, when I’m writing a mean kid character, I often think back to the mean kids I used to know. Sometimes I can still feel that dread I felt walking onto the campus of my junior high school, hoping I wouldn’t cross those kids’ paths. This is great material when bringing a fictional character to life. Continue reading ‘The Internet Can Kill a Good Writing Buzz’
The Book Aunt strikes again!
For my niece’s 10th birthday, I got her a copy of Lindsey Leavitt and Robin Mellom‘s The Pages Between Us. But of course, that’s not all she got!
A simple trip to a big super store made it easy to pick up lots of items to help the book come alive: snickerdoodles (you’d be surprised how hard it was to find a cookie with this actual name on the box, but the cinnamon Chips Ahoy! package was close enough), pickle chips (my niece had never had these before so I didn’t know if she will like them…but we’ll soon find out!), sea salt chips (I couldn’t find hummus and sea salt flavor, unfortunately–if only I’d had a chance to hit Fresh Market before the big day!), super cute pencils, and a few other items, including…(drumroll, please)…
TA-DA! The sparkly blue notebook! And what a bonus: my niece’s birthday is about a month after the back-to-school frenzy, so this was even on clearance!
Now my niece and a friend can have their very own version of the book’s adventure in friendship.
She even loved the inexpensive hot pink plastic basket in which all her goodies were nestled away. I think it was fun for my niece to get a basketful of neat snacks and special items. And it will be even more fun when she reads her new book and can, say, try pickle chips, just like the girls in the story.
I love the book-and-related-items-tie-in for gifts. It makes shopping more of an adventure and less of a chore. I can’t wait to get Lindsey’s Commander in Cheese series for my younger nieces and nephews. However, I may stop short of buying them a mouse to go with their books. My sisters-in-law have their limits!
When one begins to write a novel, one of the first things one has to decide is which point of view one should use. (And how to avoid ever having to use “one” because you can see how awkward that quickly becomes.)
I struggle with this, too. In Brand-New Emily, I used first person point of view, and I think it worked out nicely. In Jump, I used third, which I think ended up being the better choice for that particular novel (I’ll explain why in a minute). And with my new book Tig Ripley, Rock ‘n’ Roll Rebel, I used third again, but for a different reason than in Jump. Continue reading ‘A POV Tip I Picked up Somewhere’
I got some interesting news this summer: a few different schools contacted me because they were using my novel Brand-New Emily in their classroom, and now that the novel is out of print, the teachers were hoping I could help them get copies of the book. Unfortunately, I wasn’t much help as I have only so many copies in my attic, but frankly, I was kind of surprised and definitely honored that something I had written is/was a school text. Then I had this epiphany: some kid or kids at these schools have probably treated my book like any other required reading for school…meaning they’ve done no-telling-what to try to get out of having to actually read it! Knowing this makes me feel like I’ve somehow arrived. Charles Dickens, you are now my homeboy! We are both being forced upon schoolchildren!
With this in mind, I asked some friends this question: What are some of the things you did to get out of reading a book for school? Here are their pretty funny responses: Continue reading ‘Anything to Keep from Reading the Book’
(A continuation of my rant from last week…)
9. When I say I work from home, I mean I actually WORK from home. I’d like to dedicate number 9 on this list to the teacher who called me up when my daughter was little and said, “Well, since you don’t work outside the home…” and then gave me a laundry list of ways I could help her out in her classroom. It was as though she thought she were saving me from all this free time on my hands! Yes, I can be flexible when I’m not on deadline, but that doesn’t mean I’m just sitting around waiting for something to do. Why? Because… Continue reading ’16 Things Writers Wish You Knew (Part Two)’
Warning: It’s about to get real up in here.
Every profession has its list of petty annoyances. I’m sure doctors get sick of everyone they meet asking them about their physical ailments at cocktail parties. I’m sure stockbrokers would probably like to talk about their favorite movie once in a while instead of constantly being pumped for info about which investments to choose. But I don’t know much about being a doctor or a stockbroker, so I’m going to tell you about what drives writers nuts…because THAT, I know. And, hey, our writing teachers’ mantra was always, “Write what you know.”
I’ve compiled a list of 16 things I think every professional writer has at some point wanted to say (or scream) to someone. But since that’s a lot to scream at once, these are the first 8. I’ll post the remaining 8 next week. And if you have any to add in the meantime, please comment! Here we go…. Continue reading ’16 Things Writers Wish You Knew (Part One)’
Painting: just another one of the zillion things I can’t do.
A while back, an older friend of mine (in her 80s) was telling me about some needlework she’d recently done. “Oh, I wish I could learn how to do that,” I remarked. “I’m just not good at anything handy.”
Imagine my surprise when, instead of offering to teach me her skill, my friend looked at me and responded pointedly, “I think instead of trying to learn new tricks, you ought to be thankful that you can write, and just keep on working on doing that better and better every day. Be grateful you’re good at something and keep with it.”
It’s good to hang out with the older and wiser folk. They give you some good perspective…and sometimes keep you from blowing a lot of money at the fabric or craft store on stuff that you will never, ever actually use.
So, I hope you weren’t counting on an embroidered or crocheted or knitted gift from me for Christmas, because it’s not happening. Perhaps you’d appreciate a copy of Tig Ripley? Writing is pretty much all I know how to do.
But it’s enough. And I’m grateful.